by Robert Gillis
1/2012
What was so special about the silver age of comic books? Read about it HERE
(Click any image to enlarge)
Another slow news day so I thought we’d have even more fun with some gems from the Silver Age of Lois Lane comic books.
Lois Lane #80: Surprise! A birthday party for Lois! And just like in real life in the 1960s, the adults wear children’s tiny party hats (so we know it’s a birthday party) and there’s Lucy Lane, once again dressed in her freaking stewardess outfit. She’s not in the military, why is she always wearing that damn thing? And wow, “We went all out and created a photo-mural of your greatest scoops!” Yeah, it’s a LOT of trouble to clip out SIX newspaper stories and scotch-tape them to cardboard when you work at a NEWSPAPER.
Here’s a great gem the next issue, Lois Lane #81. Lois Lane suspects that this guy is working with organized crime so she fakes a call telling him to get rid of the evidence, which he does by {wait for it, wait for it} tearing it up and throwing it into the wastebasket. Maybe shredders weren’t invented back then but couldn’t he have lit a match to them or something? Important security tip, kids, if you’re a member of organized crime or selling codes to safe-crackers, and have evidence that could implicate you in mob crimes, the above method is NOT a way to security dispose of your secret papers. Especially if you have suddenly have a cleaning lady you’ve never seen before! (This guy probably disposes of his credit card receipts the same way: “I’ll just tear this Visa statement into six pieces, and throw them into the wastebasket, that way NO ONE will ever be able to ready my credit card number!”)
A common theme in Silver Age Superman stories was that Superman would drop off some incredibly dangerous item off at the Daily Planet before leaving on a mission with the admonishment, “Do not touch!” (Think apple tree in the Garden of Eden or Pandora’s Box). Invariably (i.e. EVERY TIME), Lois or Jimmy would then OPEN the box and all hell would break loose. In one, Jimmy unleashes a ray-gun that turns him into a giant turtle (really, Jimmy Olsen #53) and in countless others, Lois opens the box and things go wonky. Here’s a great example from Lois Lane #16, where Superman drops off the forbidden treasure, says “do not touch,” and Lois ignores him and ends up shooting Kryptonite out of her eyes. Her sister Lucy is on hand, this time wearing a DIFFERENT stewardess outfit. And when the hell did they get a dog? Oh, right, so Lois can use him as a seeing-eye dog later in the story. Riiiigggghhhhht.
Four issues earlier, in Lois Lane #12, after Lois learns a scientist is working on a formula to help people breath underwater, Lois decides it would be a great idea to become a mermaid so she drinks an experimental solution. “I hope it tastes good,” she says. Lois, you’re drinking an EXPERIMENTAL formula that will fundamentally alter the way you BREATHE. I’d be more worried the scientist didn’t mislabel the Drain-O.
Ah, the silver age, making us more impetuous one issue at a time 🙂
